The Diaries of a Fruitcake in a Half Baked World!

On this journey I have been on, I have disappointed people and worried others. I have come to that fork in the road where I need to go right or left. Which direction is the right one?

Many people would love to tell what they think is the right answer but when it comes down to it, you are the one that puts the foot in front of the other and pivots in the direction you feel led to go.

Would it be a path that is wide or a path that is narrow?  The path to the left is wider and many walk that path.  That path is the world.  The narrower path is the road less traveled. Why? Because it isn’t popular. It is a road that doesn’t put you first. It puts God first. Why? Because He should be all that matters.

How do you choose the path to be on?

I would have to say from my experience so far, that the best way to choose the path is by being in prayer and under a Pastor that can teach you how to live a holy and godly life unto our Lord. You might fight against it, as I did, for reasons that could be due to life experiences.

For me, I have had a major problem letting men tell me what to do. I haven’t trusted their intentions of telling me what I shouldn’t or should do. Is it for my best interest or theirs? It has been very humbling to realize that the men that have hurt me in my life so far have been on the same path as I was. Could I expect them to be any different if they are on the road of the world? No. A man on the narrow path would cherish, honor, love me as Christ loves His bride.

I know I have said this before but I will say it again. We are here to be reconciled to God. Our souls came from Him and the clothes that cover the soul are dirty.  We are God’s dirty laundry (which is the title of my book I am writing). To start this walk toward reconciliation we must understand what Holiness, Separation and being a living sacrifice means. In a study I did yesterday I would like to share my notes of what these three words that seem so hard to grasp mean.

Holiness.

When this word is applied to us, it means separation or set apart for God. Wow! Can you see yourself as being set apart FOR God? How does that happen? “But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth.” Acts 1:8.  This verse is another that talks about being born again. To truly be born again, you have to receive the Holy Ghost and the proof is speaking in other tongues. I know what you might be thinking…

WHAT?

I was raised Southern Baptist and in my upbringing we were told that speaking in tongues was not good because you don’t know what you are saying and it is of the devil. But then I read the scripture where it says no one knows, not even Satan, only God knows. That made me want to search this out a little more. It is God’s language. 1 Cor. 14:2 “For he that speaketh in an unknown tongue speaketh not unto men, but unto God: for no man understandeth him; howbeit in the spirit he speaketh mysteries.” Paul thanked God that he spoke in tongues more than us all. 1 Cor. 14:18. No wonder others think it is of the devil. That is what Satan wants everyone to think so that you won’t experience God in one of the most intimacy times you could ever have. I experienced this on April 14, 2011. I want the Comforter every time I pray. To be renewed in the Spirit.

Separation.

Ahhhh. That road that we must decide to take.  This separation is between sin and God. Separation is black or white, not gray. You pick sin or God. The world or heaven. We see the world, we don’t see heaven. So it is a battle to live for something you don’t see when you are living in a world you can see. That is the battle. We constantly battle temptations that the eyes see. BUT we can do (and overcome) all things through Christ who gives us strength.  Philippians 4:13.

What does separation look like? If we are to separate from the world of sin, which is Satan’s world, then we must not look like it or have the resemblance of it. Can you see Jesus with earrings in his ears? Walking with his pants down around his thighs? Can you see Jesus looking like the world? No, Jesus is Holy and Separate from the world that leads us to temptation and everlasting death…

A Living Sacrifice.

Even after Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice, we are still told to be a LIVING sacrifice. Huh? Sacrifices are usually dead. At least that is what I think of. When you sacrifice something you are doing away with it, whether for a good cause or not. The definition of sacrifice is the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim. Or giving to a deity, as in homage, which means something giving in acknowledgment or consideration of the worth of another. So, we are to be a sacrifice that is still living. That is mind boggling to me.

Romans 12:1-2 says, “And do not be conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.”  Here you have separation and sacrifice of yourself. You are separating because you are told not to be conformed to this world. You are sacrificing your will and your sinful desires by the renewing of your mind.  To be able to sacrifice and still live, to not be conformed to this world, to be transformed by the renewing of your mind you MUST be surrounded by people that are doing the same. If not, you will have a hard time living a life of separation.  You will be in constant battle, strength being drained, flesh being challenged because you are still in the world trying to live a holy and separated life.

Holiness includes a sacrifice of our desires and wills. That is what Holiness is. It’s separating us from the old man, the old desires and wills. BUT now we should have new desires and wills in the heavenly realm of thinking, not the worldly. There is NOTHING wrong with desire and wills that are prayerfully considered and measured with the Word of God. We come to the conclusion of what is acceptable to God when we come to Him by the Holy Ghost and a Holy Ghost filled Pastor. Your Pastor watches over your soul and your blood is on his hands. He wants you to be protected and in his calling, he suggests things that would help you. Someone that you can trust and see in flesh that God appointed over us. His job is very important because it involves our soul.

The beginning to Holiness is sanctification (separation) and that begins with the hearing of the gospel and continues through faith. Then comes Repentance, and water baptism in Jesus Name; but it’s accomplished by the infilling and indwelling of the Holy Ghost in 1 Peter 1:2.

“But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.” John 14:26

Philippians 2:12 says to work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.

We must endure to the end. Hebrews 3:14

Remember that we all have our own personal convictions but we cannot rely on the convictions or lack of convictions of others. We must seek an answer for ourselves on specific issues. We should be taught by Spirit filled teachers that God has placed over us in our Church. Any definite teaching of Scripture is enough conviction in itself, and a person cannot avoid it by saying he does not feel convicted. It’s there in your hands, written on the pages that are bound inside the leather cover.

In conclusion, do not imitate the world of sin. Be a holy people. Separate by being a living sacrifice. The closer you get to God, you won’t need those things. It won’t be easy at first but it will be sooner than you think. Be reconciled to the One who loved you so much that He gave His only Son that if you would believe in Him you should not perish but have everlasting life.  Amen.

So, which road will you take? The wide or the narrow?

You know how when as a little kid you would look up at the sky and visualize that you saw things come to life in the clouds? Well, my friend and I were walking out of a house or building, walking down the stairs and I looked up at the sky and there was a bright green dot starting to spread around in the cloud, getting bigger.

Have you ever messed around with a magic pen that when you put it to a blank piece of paper and start moving it around, it reveals things? Well, this green, whatever it was, was revealing what the cloud was.

So, it is spreading and starting to form a shape and I tell my friend, “That looks like read More >

Whether you’re already together or that someone doesn’t know you have feelings, here are some great ways to show her you care or exist.

If you sit down and think about it, there are tons of ideas for Valentine’s Day that are both free and romantic. You could make your special someone their favorite dinner, light candles, turn off all the lights, and have a super romantic dinner. Another idea is to revisit the spot where the two of you met, pack a picnic, and take a romantic walk. If you are like most people in Clarksville, you probably met your mate out of state, so re-invent that moment. If it was in a park named something else, make a sign with that name and hang it on a tree and underneath it have a blanket and eat lunch. Romance is about spending time together, and it is not always to spend lots of money doing that.

If you really love read More >

Question:
Why should how I wear my hair make any difference to God? Why should it make any difference to Him whether my hair is cut or not, whether it is short or long, whether I look masculine, or whether I look feminine? Why should it make any difference? Why should He be concerned with what I wear? All He is concerned about is my heart. Isn’t that really the truth?

Answer:
The Bible (which is God’s words to us right out of His heart) tells us that God does care, and that there are several sound and solid reasons why it does make a difference to Him. If we loved God, we will want to listen to what He has to say, and then do those things that please Him and avoid doing those things that displease Him.
True, He is primarily concerned about your heart. But if your heart is as it ought to be, you will want to obey what He tells you to do in the words of the Book He has given us.
His Word says that it is disgraceful in God’s eyes for a man to have long hair. (I Corinthians 11:14)
His Word says that God has given long hair to a woman for a covering and a glory. (I Corinthians 11:15)
His Word says that a woman must not pray or speak in church without her head being covered (I Corinthians 11:5) with long hair (verse 15)
His Word says that a man must not pray or speak in church unless the covering (of long hair) has been cut off (I Corinthians 11:4)
His Word says that God’s churches have no custom contrary to this teaching. (I Corinthians 11:16)
Why did God make these rules about hair? The study of typology explains this. Man is a type of Christ, woman of the church. Long hair is symbolical of subjection. For a man to have long hair is to symbolize that Christ is not the head of the church. For women to cut their hair is to teach that the church need not be subject to Christ. So you can see that God considers this a very important matter.
If we are real Christians, not just lukewarm, professing church members, we will respect God’s express desires in this matter and want to please Him in every way.
Boys will keep their hair trimmed above their collars, their ears showing, clean shaven, and sideburns well trimmed.
Girls will let their hair grow long without trimming or thinning.
God’s Word also teaches us how we ought to dress. His Word tells us that any immodest clothing such as mini-skirts are out (I Timothy 2:9)
His Word says that it is important to Him that men dress like men and women dress like women (Deuteronomy 22:5)
His Word in the same verse tells us that for girls to wear slacks or other mail-copied articles, or for fellows to wear frilly, feminine-type clothing is an “abomination” (a hateful and detestable thing) unto the Lord. This also goes for uni-sex style clothing, alike for both fellows and girls.
God is concerned about our identification – about whether our dress identifies us with His church or with the world. God does not want us identifying with the ungodly. Any Christian who dresses to appear like the world identifies with them, and God said that “if any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him” (I John 2:15)
If a man doesn’t want the sheep to think him a wolf, he shouldn’t walk among the flock on hands and knees with wolfskin on!
There is a Christian custom (I Corinthians 11:16), and God’s people should dress according to that custom. The question we should ask is, Does my dress say, “I belong to this world?” or does it say, “I am separate from the world, I belong to God?” Your dress identifies you with the group you most like, the godly, or the ungodly.
May our hearts be so in love with Jesus that we will desire to please Him in our dress, in the way we wear our hair, and in every other way too.

So, how does it get to this point?  How does it get started?

You confide in one person and wham! it has turned into a rumor mill with so many different varieties in the situation you are in.

What do you believe when you hear it? Are you shocked like these women or are you shaking your head in the no position and then telling your friends?

That has been the story of my life for over a year now. I have disappeared from the public eye for over a year.  I have heard so many things about me, after resurfacing into a new career.  I am ashamed by what I hear my “friends” have said and then I am shocked that those things WERE said about me.  I have been talked about, judged and ostracized.

First, let me say that no one is perfect. That includes the gossiper.  If you hear something about someone, go to the person and let them know it is going around. Maybe you can stop the rumor mill because the person being gossiped about won’t be able to stop it once it gets into the ears of the right people.  It spreads like wild fire.

I am have been keeping read More >

Every since I was a little girl I have always been what some would call a “loner”.  I never followed the crowd or trend. I was my own person…making my own path. I never liked being under someone’s authority or doing what someone told me to do. (Aren’t all children that way?)

As I grew up I became more secluded.  I didn’t go out and party with the rest of the teenagers, I stayed read More >

Can you surrender all? Even your thoughts?
Do you know what it is like being in a relationship where there is adultery? I became very observant to the looks that I would see in mine. Every woman knows what I am talking about. There doesn’t have to be any infidelities admitted, you just have that gut feeling.
Many men and women believe that committing adultery is the actual act of being intimate, becoming one. That is a partially true. If that is the only way to commit adultery then it’s a lie to keep you living in a false sense of right, when really it’s wrong.

Adultery begins with a thought.

You might think you are strong and can keep your eyes to yourself but what happens when the woman wears the blouse a little to low and you can see her cleavage? Or maybe the skirt is a little above the knee? Your thoughts are what happens next. I like to say there is a second look rule.  You look once without thought. If someone is attractive, you look.  When you do a double take or you turn to look back or you position yourself where you aren’t obvious that you are looking, your thoughts have possibly turned into sin.

Matthew 5: 27,28 Jesus said, “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.”

Lust in the dictionary means, self-indulgent sexual desire; a strong sexual desire; have a craving, appetite, or great desire for.

Women who dress this way might say they do because they are confident about their appearance but the truth of the matter is this…

They want the attention. They need it.
They are missing something very important in their life. A piece that belongs to Jesus. By dressing this way women hinder not only the man but the other women around.  Women? For the woman it’s not always jealousy or low self esteem. Ladies, it is fear.

My Momma told me a while ago what fear means.

FEAR =

F- False

E- Events

A- Appearing

R- Real

You might cause their spouse or boyfriend to have a wandering eye for you. This leads to ungodly thoughts. It’s not a woman’s insecurities, it’s their home unit that is being invaded. They might have a man that they like and in walks the woman looking all seductive and the man naturally will look at her. The woman who isn’t dressed provocatively but modest begins to fade in the background.

I was this woman at one time. I began to ask myself why I wore so much eye make-up and why I chose those tight jeans. When I was truthful with myself, I started paying attention to everything I did. I wore the eye make up to attract my husband, at the time, to my eyes. I would always get compliments on my eyes. I wanted the compliments from him but if he didn’t notice, someone did. He liked me wearing make up. I wore the tight jeans so that it would show off my curves. I was wanting attention, to feel attractive and my ex liked me in jeans, not skirts. I carried myself with my shoulders back, head raised and chest forward. I was confident in my walk but I was messed up in my heart. It wasn’t until I found Jesus and became convicted on it that I stopped doing these things for attention. It was really hard to let go of it, especially when you no longer have someone to compliment you and you have been used to getting those compliments. I realized that by wearing the clothes and make up like I did, I was causing others to stumble. I didn’t want to be a stumbling block. Yes, I wanted to be attractive to my husband but not at the expense of other men looking and their wives or girlfriends sending me daggers with their looks.

So ladies, let’s be honest, you might want to ask yourself these questions that I asked myself:
1) When you put on your clothes, why do you choose provocative instead of modest apparel? Do you put on the jeans and turn around and think your bottom looks good and you will get looks on it? Or maybe the tightness on your legs will show how skinny you are? Maybe the shirt is low and reveal your cleavage, showing what you have? Will all eyes be on you?
2) Why do you make yourself pretty with artificial cosmetics? Do you put on the eyeliner thick to bring the color of your eyes out? Do you want them to look there instead of the bad areas you think you have? Maybe your eyes are the only thing you think is attractive? That isn’t true.  Natural beauty is attractive and believe me, when a man sees the inside being beautiful, you will become the most attractive woman ever.

Haha, men reading this might think, what? A man doesn’t look at the inside and the beauty comes to the outside. Men, I am telling you, when you see a woman who isn’t showing off her assets, sure you probably won’t give her a second look but if that woman became a friend or asked you for coffee and sat across from you, you would be seeing the real woman, not the appearance of the woman. Her heart will show on her face and she would start to spark something in you. She might be smart, she might be funny, she might be all of those things and when you see who she is, inside, you will be attractive for the right reasons, not the false reasons.

One thing you have to understand is that not all women who dress modest do so because they don’t care about being what the world considers attractive. They do care about their appearance. They want to be clean and attractive but naturally and modestly. They do so because they are led to be natural. They don’t want to be a stumbling block to other men or women.  They are covering a multitude of sin that could be happening because of the way they appear to the world.  They are not being conformed to this world but standing out with the standard of purity and modesty. God has a standard and it is written for a reason in the Bible.

Isaiah 47:2-3 reveals what God calls “nakedness” or immodesty. It is to “make bare the leg” and “uncover the thigh”.  1 Timothy 2:9 calls us, men and women, to dress in modest apparel.When you have such a love for God and such an abhorrence for worldliness that you will allow God to set your standards as to whether a dress is modest or not…you can’t go wrong!

Yes, man will sin with their thoughts even over women who dress modestly but the difference is you. If you are being worldly, not living for what God says, then you will be just as much at fault. You will be adding fuel to the fire. I know this might seem harsh but this is the truth. You are making it harder for others and yourself to live a Holy life because you are getting the wrong approval. You are getting approval from man and not your God.  If you are living for God and dress modestly and man or woman stumble in their sin, it is their sin, not yours.

So women, let’s cover a multitude of sin and dress modestly not provocatively.  Pay attention to your motives when you put on your make up, your clothes.  When you do, you will have to come to terms on why you are doing it in the first place, like I did. If you can honestly say that you wear everything because you like it, go a step further and ask why you like it. If you love putting on make up and are good at it, you gotta go deeper and realize that maybe, just maybe by you wearing it to show off how good you are, you get the ladies complimenting you and making you feel good about yourself. It’s nice to have accolades but you would find it is more fulfilling having accolades when you are doing it for the right reasons. Really what is make up good for? Making you more attractive? Hey, I was there. When a man sees you in your natural and loves you, you are accepted for who you really are. You have let your mask down. You are showing the REAL you.

Some helpful hints. I was given some “covers” that snap onto my bra and I couldn’t believe how much I revealed with my shirts until I put one on. I don’t have to get rid of all my shirts and wear high collars, I just snap on the cover to my bra and I am more modest. Decide on the length of your skirt to not go over your knee. That means when you sit down, your knees aren’t showing.  Why? Well, everyone is convicted differently depending on where they are in their walk with Jesus and what their Pastor preaches. If a man can see your knee or above your knee, his thoughts will wander to what you look like without that skirt. Yes, that is his problem but he wouldn’t have that problem if he couldn’t see your knee. So help a brother out. Don’t show your knee.

I know this generation is all about ME, ME, ME. But can we stop and think of others and how we can help them? Our sacrifice to our selfishness will be rewarded.

What do you do, when love comes along and offers your heart a chance to move on?

There are no guarantees, no safety nets, just trusting your heart and taking that first step.

Second chance? Do you take it and fly? Or do you ignore it and tell yourself it isn’t time because you have other things going on? Maybe you think you don’t deserve a chance at something that could be amazing because you don’t want to drop your guard and possibly be hurt again.  It’s safer to not have loved than to love at all and get hurt, right?

WRONG!

We all know love or relationships are hard work.  Having to learn personalities all over again and hoping that they aren’t like the others that didn’t work out before them.  Every relationship that has gone sour, hurt. You know what you don’t want in the next person that is given a chance to get to know you…but you aren’t giving them a chance, you are giving yourself a chance.

A chance to be happy, to enjoy someone’s company, to laugh, hold hands, feel a part of someone’s life and to be hurt. To argue, not always agree with someone, need space to miss that person, someone to run to when you wanna cry but be connected to someone, non the less. No pain, no gain…right? It is so true when you have found someone or someone has found you and there is a connection.

RelationSHIP

It seems to be the most un-sturdy and uncertain vessel to navigate through any ocean of the heart. While the warm winds of prevailing love and romance blow favorably through its sails, this unseaworthy vessel steers ahead with pride and promise. But upon hitting rough and stormy weather, too often the relationSHIP flounders and sinks.

How do you know if you are in a relationship? Well, the definition for relationship is a state of connectedness between people, especially an emotional connection.

What is an emotional connection in a relationship? It’s something that goes beyond just the physical. It’s being able to relate to a person on an emotional level. To be able to share your feelings with them, being open and vulnerable, and trusting that person not to hurt you emotionally. Though it could happen. When you find that you are spending a lot of time together in a relaxed environment you will find opportunities for sharing feelings and talk openly about things. One thing that nourishes the emotional connection is cuddling. I am not talking about sexual touching but non-sexual touching and physical closeness.  We communicate a lot nonverbally.  Hugging, cuddling, touching, holding your partner – these things all express your feelings for him or her without saying a word.

When two people spend quality time together, sharing, caring, nurturing, and loving, an emotional attachment is formed.  If this continues overtime, the bond created becomes deeper and stronger. It will almost feel as if they have known each other all their lives.

An emotional connection fuses souls and strongly ties two hearts together, making individuals inseparable.  When a person is able to feel your heartaches, that constitutes an emotional connection. When kind words are used to uplift each other, then there is no question as to what it is.  It is, indeed, an emotional connection, and no other feeling in this world could compare.

In the event of two available individuals, two that are not attached in a marriage or other relationship, it should be highly valued.  Love is the end result of such unified bond. A bond which can withstand the test of time, and continue to live on long after individuals are gone.

Life is too short to ignore chances that come your way.  I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. There is no such thing as a flukes. It wasn’t chance you met this person or that.  They are in your life for a season or for a life time.  Only God knows and it is God who you have to trust to get you through.

So what do you do, when love comes along and offers your heart a chance to move on?

You are wanted when a man is attracted and decides he wants to possibly be a permanent fixture in your life. You are wanted when other men look at you and your boyfriend, fiance, or husband sees that you are attracting other mens attention.

What makes us wanted?

Is it our personality? Our spirit and attitude toward others?
Doesn’t those qualities make someone beautiful on the outside? Or is it strictly the eye candy; what we look like on the outside?

The outside appearance is what 99% of the time attracts someone to you before they know what you are like on the inside. That is how society has conditioned us to be.
Sure, being attractive gains the attention of a man but what about your flaws, your quirks? Flaws like scars on your body or maybe burns that you cover up?
Will the man who has been courting you and getting to know the inside, turn once he sees what is hidden?

Well, first of all no man should see what is hidden, physically under clothes until you are married. So, if you are faithful to your convictions, what will this man think on the wedding night and he sees scars that were hidden? Will he feel like he was fooled? Or will his love be so strong that your scars are part of you? They are a road map to your journey in life. Are there men that think like that or is this just my romantic heart talking?

(Men reading this might say, “No, I wouldn’t turn away.” But there are men that would. Men who think it is all about him and his quest, no matter whose heart he breaks in the journey to finding the perfect woman.)
There is no perfect woman. The women modeling the cover of any magazine is always photoshopped. Some flaw is being covered up. We all have flaws. Including the men looking.

Why am I saying all of this? Because there are women out there that have experienced the heart ache of someone sharing and saying everything that made them fall. That person might have been genuine and sincere but there are men who will say all the things to win your heart and once you share yourself, your family, your hopes and dreams, your very being; you find out that they weren’t serious even though they sounded like it with all the right words. Could it be because you shared what was covered up? He saw the flaws and maybe he knows he will find someone that isn’t as badly scared as you because he really wants the top of the line. Your line has kinks.

Is this how the dating scene is?

I’m new to the dating field and I have not dated since my divorce, which has been about a year now. Sure I have been asked out but I haven’t been able to allow myself to put that foot forward. After being married for 20+ years, marrying young at 18 and only dating a few men before marrying, I am finding that I have a lot to work on. I come across as naive, being easily deceived, or too trusting when it comes to things said to me. When I talk to someone, I guess I don’t have my guard up if I am looking at them in the eye. I always give that person standing in front of me the benefit of the doubt and my trust until he is caught in lies. Then I start building my wall one brick at a time. I no longer let him see all of who I am because he was secretive, deceptive and sneaky. Trust has to be rebuilt.

What happens when your focus shifts?

I no longer gave my Lord the attention I was giving Him all these years since I found the truth. The Word says that He is a jealous God. I believed that now was my time to be happy and thinking that I was saved and knowing how God heard all my cries and knew the desires of my heart, I could concentrate on being happy with someone who loved the Lord too. My priorities being shifted caused me heartache and confusion. I’m so sorry, not because it caused me heartache and confusion but because I hurt God.

There are so many people hurting from relationships or confusions of what it is they really have. If they would turn to God, pursue Him, all else would fall into place. A friend of mine was talking about the verse that says if you delight in God, He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

If you trust in the Lord and do what is right… He will answer your prayers. The answer might be a “yes” or it could be a “no” but non the less, He will answer in His timing.  Your faith and obedience will bring divine blessing.  Hebrew translation says, He will grant to you the requests of your heart. It doesn’t mean you use this verse to get what you want.  God knows your heart. You can’t truly delight in Him without having the truth in you. Once you truly delight in Him, you will forget your desires and want only what He wants for your life.  At least that is what is happening to me. See, His ways are better than ours.  It’s just admitting it to yourself and believing it and living it.

So in conclusion of my post, “Covered Up” we all cover up something that we don’t want the other person to know for fear that they will see our faults and run. Especially if we really like that person and could see something futuristic with them.  When you open yourself up and share your heart, you have just let someone in to see the real you. There is NOTHING wrong with sharing your heart, it is a sign of trusting that person.  I would say 100% of the time that person you trust will hurt you BUT you have to understand that in your search for the perfect person, there is no one perfect. Every one of us gets hurt by someone we care about. It’s what you do with your hurt.  Forgiveness and the will to start rebuilding what has been cracked is up to you.

It is just like a wound. Once you have an open wound, the healing takes place and you have a scar. Scars can be reopened but only if you ALLOW it.  When they are, you find scar tissue. Scar tissue is tough to cut through and once it heals, it becomes tougher. When someone you care about hurts you and you make the choice to stay and not run, your relationship becomes tougher. But it is up to you. Do you want to search for the perfect person and have many scars?  It is your choice. Your free will. Doing it alone and your way is what will take you longer to finding peace. The key is knowing the One who heals those hurts and can help put you back on the road to recovery.

JESUS!

Just have… “a closer walk with thee.”

If the person that has hurt you by their actions is meant to be in your life, God will convict their heart and they will try to make things right. They will grow in the Word and so will you. Who knows if when you both put your delights in God, He merges your paths because it was all in His timing.  He is the mender of all open wounds. It’s up to you if you want scars all over your heart by doing it yourself.

Mark Zuckerberg has received one of the highest honors from Time Magazine. He is the Person of the Year for 2010.  How interesting that when the divorce rate is the highest it has ever been, you see many court appearances submitting Facebook evidence.

The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers says 81 percent of its members have used or faced evidence found on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, YouTube and LinkedIn over the past five years, according to AP. Facebook leads the pack in terms of online evidence, with MySpace a distant second.

Kind of sad but at the same time I guess there is some good.  Everyone that has graduated high school can look everyone up.  That is the excuse of many, looking up old friends, boyfriends, girlfriends from the past.

Your past will catch up to you or you will get caught up in it.

So here’s to Mark Zuckerberg and all he has accomplished in giving us Facebook.  If only people would use it for the good and not for the bad.

Read more about Mark’s life….

I forgive all the men that came before; I start now with me!

I am finding that one of the most important keys to dating success lies in not becoming The Bitter Woman. If it hasn’t happened yet, it is time to learn to love and trust the opposite sex. Leaving all your unresolved man issues at the curb. The past is the past.  It’s time to say, “I forgive all the men who came before; I start with me!” Forgiveness, I am finding just now, is lightening my load.

Not even a week ago there was a woman friend wanting a man to love her so badly that she read More >

“You were not created to complete another, but to complement.”

How true that statement is!  Many, including myself, have been on the quest to be complete with someone else. You know the simple line that Tom Cruise’s character in Jerry Maguire said to the woman he finally realized he loved, “You complete me.”  Everyone woman wanted to hear that from a man after seeing that movie. But what we don’t understand is that we should complement the other. We should be complete in Jesus. If a woman is not complete in Jesus, she will be a drain read More >

Proverbs 31 is a portrait of the virtuous woman and can be a mirror that all women can examine themselves, though we all fall short to the likeness. But the woman who does look in the mirror will catch something of the beauty of spirit and the serenity of the virtuous woman. She must keep striving with a willing heart to be complete.

It is called “The ABC of the Perfect Wife” because read More >

This morning I was doing my morning bible study about 6 am and during this study thought about… frosty the snowman?! That was really weird but I started singing the song, “Frosty the snowman was a jolly happy soul”.  I started thinking about us being jolly. Are we a happy soul? With the story, which was my favorite as a child, Frosty came to life one day.

When we find Jesus or better yet, when we choose to follow Christ, we come to life that day. read More >

Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?               James 4:11-12

What happens when we judge someone in our mind? Are we trying to lift ourselves up because we are having low self-esteem? Is it because we are jealous of what the other has? Maybe someone that we look at seems to have it all together and we know that we don’t, so something has to be wrong with the person and we try to find it. Maybe you are sitting in a book store and in walks 4 women with their hair up, no make up and long skirts. What do you think? Do you look at them and judge them right there?

We judge because we don’t understand someone’s choices. Choices that make them look a certain way. Their choices have them where they are now and maybe you don’t like where you are and want what they have. Maybe you don’t. Maybe you judge someone because they wore that outfit to church and it is making all the men look at them. Maybe she is overweight and is sitting at a restaurant eating a big piece of cake. Maybe she is walking down the hallway of school holding another girls hand.

What about speaking evil about one another, brothers? By this verse saying “brothers”, James was talking to our brothers and sisters in Christ. Why do we speak evil about one another? Life is so hard when you walk out your front door. It is so hard to be around others who are talking about someone else and not join in.

It’s hard for me. I mean, I have turned my life around and have felt the Lord in my life, showing me the areas that I need to change to make me live more righteously (that means living right for God). I have been searching for holiness in my life. Sometimes it is confusing and sometimes it isn’t. I have made a decision to not get on facebook or email or anything on the computer until after I have given the Lord my time in the morning. I was noticing that my life was getting out of control and I didn’t know how to take hold of it. I realized that God was getting the last part of my day when He should have been getting the first.

Living my life, making the choices I make now, I  try to do it all out of love and wanting to do what the Lord convicts me of. There are some things I might not be convicted of that you are, but it doesn’t mean that you or I are less than what we should be. Everyone has their on convictions. Where one might have a conviction to stop drinking, I don’t because I don’t drink anymore. (I recently found out that I am allergic to alcohol and have immediate side effects.) I rarely did anyway because of the side effects I had, swelling immediately in my hands after the first sip. So, we all have different convictions.  The Lord deals with each of us differently but it all is going toward one goal: to be reconciled to Him.

I do have a hard time with being out in the world. I try to stay to myself and the reason is not because I don’t like people or think I am better but because I have a weakness and it’s called listening to gossip. I sometimes fall into it or I just stand or sit there. Sometimes I will start it by saying something I heard earlier and want to know if that person heard it. Even when I don’t say anything, it is just as bad because I am allowing it to enter where the Lord’s Spirit resides. After all is said and done, I walk away feeling like I failed miserably. So, I have been trying to not talk about anything that I have read that is the bad fall of someone else. The news I hear is always a conversational piece to break the ice when I’m with someone else. BUT like I said I am trying to stop that.

SO, if you are close to me or talk to me and I start saying something about what I have heard, please stop me. I would like to try and tell others to stop when they start but I just don’t know how. Have you been able to stop someone from going any further in their gossip about another person? If so, will you share with me?

This is my daughter on her webcam.  She doesn’t wear make up, which is surprising to me. Neither of my girls wear make up.  I am amazed, coming from the generation that I am in and being around the make up I was around, that my girls didn’t feel the need to wear it.

When I was younger I would sit and watch my Momma put on her make up and wish I would be like her when I grew up.  She did the wigs and everything. I just loved it all.  I had the magazines that showed me how to put on makeup, etc… I did wear a lot of it.  I hid behind the make up.  I didn’t want people to see who I really was underneath.

I am so blessed that my girls don’t feel the need to put make up on. That they recognize their natural beauty without all the other stuff.  It is freeing. Why do we feel we have to wear make up?  I still wear it today but it’s a habit that I have had for over 20 years. It’s part of my life. Believe me, I don’t wear it like I use to.

I think the world of glamour and beauty is what caused me to want to do it. I wanted to look like those women in the magazines. I believe that is called envy, possibly. Plus we all know that men are visual. Women attract men by the way they look. I got my man. He likes me to wear make up when we go out to special events but loves me just as much without it. I do love the way my face feels when it is clean.

I asked my daughter why she doesn’t wear make up and she said that she knows that when she wears it, it clogs her pores and she wants her face clean. She doesn’t want to have big pores when she is older.  That is one thing that both my Mom and I have had a problem with, bigger pores. My Mom’s has shrunk some with age, as well as her height (Love you Momma) and I am using cleaning products to try and help with that issue.

Mally Beauty has a product that minimizes the pore appearance, which I bought and it does work: Perfect Prep Poreless Primer. It has a silky feeling and you don’t even know it is on.

If you haven’t thought about it, possibly wearing make up is second nature to you, think about it and let me know why you wear make up or don’t wear it. I would love to hear the different responses I will get.

Growing up, I saw the way people treated their animals. Some let them inside the home and some didn’t allow the animals inside but had them outside for guarding purposes. A close family member at one time mentioned that animals didn’t have feelings so they just treated them however they wanted to.

I have seen on the local news how pet owners treat their animals, whether it be chaining them to a tree or leaving them out in the winter months or having them trained to attack other animals, which is illegal. I’m here to tell you that animals do have feelings! Looking at those examples, humans treat other humans the same way. People have been chained to something to work or stand guard, people have been left outside in the winter months, people have been trained to do bad things to others. Are we really that much different? read More >

First of all this was one movie that I really didn’t know much about because I didn’t watch any previews or trailer clips. If you haven’t heard of it, click on the video above and watch the preview.

I must say that I think this is the best movie I have seen that can touch everyone, no matter what you like.  For instance, there are Star Trek fans but others won’t go watch it if they aren’t interested in Star Trek or never watched it as a kid or adult. You might be lost in that film if you don’t know who James T. Kirk is or Spock. But with this film, WOW!  The graphics and story line keep you from falling asleep even though it is a long movie.

It is in 3D and I was told from many on my Facebook when I asked about it, that 3D is the way to go! Well, some people might get motion sickness because of the action and movement that is in this film. If you don’t get motion sickness, then you should be fine and it would be one heck of a movie to watch in 3D!  In my family I have some that get motion sickness, so we didn’t watch it in 3D and we went to the 9 pm showing. We were in our car at 11:50 going home, so it is about a 2-1/2 hour movie.

I don’t want to say too much about the movie. The video above says all you need to know, to go and see it.  I have noticed that in previews, whatever you see is usually the only best parts of the movie but with this one, there is so much more that is good that isn’t in the preview.

Leaving last night I thought that James Cameron is smart! Who wouldn’t want to watch a film and be happy for the man, who is in the wheelchair, to be able to run again? This movie is perfect for everyone. There is hardly any cursing, that I can remember, and there isn’t any nudity scenes.

So, out of all the movies I have scene this year for 2009, Avatar is the best, hands down! Go see it!!